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C. Lee McKenzie

Young Adult and Middle Grade Author

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Corpus Christi and WEP-February Challenge

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I’m off to Corpus Christi, Texas in a few days to be at the Teen Bookfest By the Bay with a lot of other YA authors. Some writers from UnCommonYA. and of course, my fabulous crit partner, Yvonne Ventresca. I always get excited when I’m going to meet other writers, especially those I share my writing process with. Yvonne is the only crit partner I haven’t met in person, so this is going to make the event very exciting. I’ll post about it.

Now I’ve decided to jump into Yolanda and Denise’s February WEP, Valentine’s Lost and Found. This is a bit early, but hope it’s okay because I’m still trying to stick with my Post On Mondays Only policy. 

Denise Covey and Yolanda Renee

Jolly was my first dog. He is still the dog that has my heart and always will. We grew up together. I remember when I got into serious trouble with my gram and Jolly would stand at my side while she scolded me—her corporal punishment was shaking her finger in my face until my eyes crossed. Then I had to go to my room for decades. Well, not decades, but at eight, the hour of confinement was long enough for world wars to be fought and won or lost. 
Jolly stuck with me during those decades. He’d say things like, “You’re my girl. You’ll be just fine, and all is going to be great in a short time. Besides, I’m here with you. Let’s just cuddle.”
So we did. 
Then when I was thirteen, my mom and gram decided I needed to visit the homeland. They shipped me off to Kansas where their roots were, but where I was the stranger in a strange land. I wrote and called home a lot—mostly about not being a fit for Kansas and missing Jolly. It wasn’t natural being away from home or him. 
In each conversation with Mom and Gram they said all was well, not to worry. 
“He’s a bit mopey, but gram and I are walking him.”
”Jolly’s fine, honey. Enjoy your visit.”
“I brushed him today and told him you’ll be home in a couple of weeks.”
When I made my last call, the news wasn’t that cheery. Jolly had some problems. I begged to come home immediately, but my return airline ticket was already purchased. I could come back in a few days, just not that day. 
When I finally set foot on native soil again, I ran up the ramp and to my family. I fully expected they would smuggle Jolly into the airline terminal, but there were only two humans to greet me—two humans with grief all over their faces.
They didn’t have to tell me I’d never hold Jolly again, that he’d never curl up next me with warmth and encouragement. I knew. I also knew they’d done their best to save him, but I had this terrible gash inside me that none of my family could ever stitch up.
All I could think was that his girl hadn’t there when he needed her, and his girl has always regretted that. 
This is for Jolly, the dog I loved and lost. His name suited him. 


Quote of the Week: “A man is only as good as what he loves.” Saul Bellow

Comments

  1. Oh, wow, I'm sorry you had to go through that! Losing a pet definitely hurts, and it's the sort of thing that sticks with you for the rest of your life: both the pain and the love you had for them.

    Alexa
    thessalexa.blogspot.com
    verbositybookreviews.wordpress.com

  3. What a heartrending story. And for a child to have to go through. There's nothing like a dog for comforting one and when they go, it is so painful. Love the photo of Jolly.

  4. I can imagine how you felt to find out your dog was gone. It is so hard to lose a loved pet and this one was your childhood friend. Jolly looks like he was a fine dog.

  5. Of all the WEP stories I've read so far, this one hurt me the most. I love dogs more than people in a lot of cases. It hurts losing your childhood dog 🙁

  6. So sorry about Jolly- I have lost many dogs over the course of my life and each one hurt to my core and I still grieve for them.

    Hope you are having a blast in Texas. It sounds like an all around awesome time. 🙂
    ~Jess

  7. As a dog lover, that story really touched my heart.

    I've had the pleasure of meeting some great dogs, but sadly never had one of my own. While the heartbreak of losing a friend like that would no doubt be immense, I think it would be worth all the joy that preceded it.

    At least Jolly still lives on in your heart.

  9. Oh well, now I'm balling like a baby. My girlfriend just stopped by and they're off to the vets to put her cat to sleep. Shish. You guys! This is a sad, sweet story, My best friend's name was Sam. Cried for a month when he passed.

  10. Awww, such a tender memory to share. He will always have a place in your heart to cuddle close. I had a Dalmatian too, growing up. They're a special breed:) You're welcome to visit my border collie sidekick anytime.

  12. That's a heartbreaking story of love and loss. Hard for a young girl to grapple with the loss of a favourite pet, but in a way, it's also good to be spared the sadness of the actual process/details of death, they are not easy to witness.

  19. My first dog was Shorty. She stayed with me through elementary, junior high, high school, and through the first year of college. When she died, a great part of my own heart died.

    She died at the vet's — without me there. It haunted me so that now, I hug my furry friends as the vet sends them to that land that knows only happy runs and endless games.

    O.K. Now, I'm crying. Great fun at the book fest. 🙂

  20. So sad that you couldn't be there when Jolly needed you. I'm sure he was thinking of you though.
    Have a great time at the bookfest.

  21. Wonderful true story. I can relate to it. I too had a favorite dog named Prexie and she will always be my favorite dog.
    Very touching and I like how you expressed the not being there when Jolly needed you. That is something that will linger with you.
    Shalom,
    Pat

  24. Dogs are so much a part of us. I've had several and each took a part of me when they died. My mother used to give our dogs away when they got older and started to need the vet. I think that was harder than holding them as they died. I dream about them sometimes. Good story.
    Nancy

  29. Aww, this broke my heart. So sad. Jolly was a gorgeous dog and what a great picture.
    I hope you have a wonderful time in Corpus Christi! It's always so fun to meet blog friends in person.

  31. Hi Lee – I can empathize – Jolly looks an amazing dog .. and your heart still grieves I'm sure .. how terribly sad.

    However enjoy the conference – it will be fun .. lots of kids longing to read … happy times and enjoy meeting up with fellow writers, bloggers and Yvonne – cheers Hilary

  33. The emotions of a heartbroken little girl come through in your story, Lee. Losing a favourite pet is so heartbreaking, made even more so by not being by their side to offer love and consolation. What a beautiful, aristocratic dog Jolly was.

    Enjoy the bookfest. Thank you for participating in the WEP Valentine's challenge.

    Denise 🙂

  36. Aw, cute picture of your dog! I hope you have fun at the conference. That's great you get to finally meet the last of your crit partners! I have one that lives in another state and i'd LOVE to meet her one day too.

  37. What a cute Dalmatian! And with a name like "Jolly" he had to be a sweetheart and adorable – it's right there in his name. Great Valentine's Day post for WEP! (I can't believe your family packed you off to Kansas. Ugh. Sounds like punishment to me. 😛 )

    • I did point out that both Gram and Mom had left Kansas, so there must have been a reason. The state has a lot to recommend it, but it didn't do much for me at that early age.

  38. Reading an entry about animal love is a happy discovery for me. In my past it's always been about cats, the only dog I've truly bonded with is my current pet, Fio. It's nice to read and know that I'm not the only one whose heart has stretched for a 4-legged friend 🙂 Yes, it was sad and you plucked at my heartstrings and I'm sorry for your loss but I'm grateful for you sharing this story and letting that grief shine a little 🙂 Thanks for writing! What a great name for a dog too 🙂

  40. Jolly was an awesome dog. And so beautiful! That story is heartbreaking. I'm sorry you didn't get to see him, at least to say goodbye.

    Enjoy the Bookfest!

  41. Jolly was an awesome dog. And so beautiful! That story is heartbreaking. I'm sorry you didn't get to see him, at least to say goodbye.

    Enjoy the Bookfest!

  43. Oh my, I have tears in my eyes. I am certain this pains you even now but I know Jolly is with you even now, you just can't see him. I have had a few dogs but one was Fox. She actually looks more like a Coyote. She was so smart and was always with me. I wanted my parents to have her spade since all the dogs came by but my parents were so old school and didn't see why one should spend money on this. She got pregnant by a St. Bernard and she was such a small thing compared to the St. Bernard. When I came home from school, I wondered where she was until my mom told me matter of factly. Fox was in a lot of pain and took my mom's sleeve and led her to the car! My mom brought her to the vet and the vet told my mom the puppies were so big Fox could not have them normally plus Fox had little chance of surviving plus the puppies were dead so my mom had her put down. I know she was not in good shape at the moment and the Vet said it was for the best but I never really forgave my parents for not getting her spade.

  45. Have fun in Texas at the Bookfest. Such fun to meet and speak with fans! Enjoy!
    I identified with your story. So heartbreaking for a young girl. I'm much older and the loss of my sweet little girl, Patches, still hurts.

    Thanks for being part of the WEP Valentine Challenge.

  47. That's so sad. My first dog-love, Whiskey, was my Jolly. We had him in the pre-leash law age, then the law was passed, and he never could get used to the leash. A neighbor kept complaining, so we had to send him away to a new home. I never liked those neighbors again. And I learned to never complain about someone's pet. No matter how annoying I find them. It was a heart breaking moment in my young life.