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Alex J. Cavanaugh |
I used to think that insecurity would vanish as I grew older and improved my craft. That is not the case.
If anything, I think it has increased in size and duration–like, it’s no longer gorilla big; it’s gorilla ginormous, and it’s there all the time.
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Photo Credit |
So why?
My theory is that the more you come to understand what you’re up against in the publishing world, the more you anticipate those hurdles and know just what it takes to get over them. There’s something positive about having that knowledge, but I think that knowledge also is anxiety producing, which leads to insecurity, and which leads me to write posts like this every first Wednesday of the month.
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Hosts The Madlab Post & Write Game |
I’m also posting on The Road Trip this summer while I take a road trip or two with Mario the Muse. He and I needed a break and new scenery. If you have time I’m featuring a few bloggers on my latest post. It could be YOU, so come take a peek.
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On the road with Mario |
Do you have a theory about this thing we label as insecurity? Taking any road trips this summer? Want more books to wrap up your summer reading?
I couldn't agree more… The path to publication can be extremely intimidating, yet always worthwhile. As Louis L'Amour said, "The trail is the thing, not the end of the trail." And at this rate, I'll be traveling for quite a while!
Anxiety producing is right. The more I learn, the scarier it gets. When confronted with all the marketing an Indie author needs to do, I sometimes wonder what I was thinking to consider publishing in the first place.
Off to read the A to Z Road Trip post…
Hey, I hear what you're saying but I choose to look at it as "Knowledge is Power". I always like to know what I'm dealing with in any aspect of life, rather than fumbling blind. That makes me more anxious! Then again, sometimes it would be nice to go back to that wide-eyed idealism we all start out with… Thanks for highlighting the awesome giveaway!
Have fun on your road trips! And I agree, I think anxiety keeps coming up in any career, writing or otherwise. It just changes as you move through things.
YES! The more I know about the craft the more I know how bad it could be so I freak lol…it never ends!
A change of scenery is always a good idea to clear out the cobwebs in our minds.
Honestly, I think insecurity is a form of self-sabotage. Of thinking in terms of success and failure, when things rarely are that simple. I'm trying to teach myself not to think like that, but it does take a lot of effort.
There's always one more mountain to climb, one more river to cross, to be cliched. No doubt you've had to put in a mammoth effort to get where you are Lee, so take off with Mario the Muse and hit the road. I'd better stay home for awhile and catch up!
Have a great month!
Denise π
It seems to me that I get insecure about different things the older I get. The things that are really important to me matter more, so I tend to think about them more (and I learn more about them too- which can cause insecurity to fester). I do my best to focus on the positive, but I think we can't help but worry sometimes. π
~Jess
(Tried to post this earlier, but my comment had trouble posting- so hopefully this time works.)
there is insecurity in every aspect of life, but even more so in this subjective, fickle industry! we just have to keep plugging away!
checking out your a to z post =)
Yes, the more you learn about this industry to more stressful it is. Sad but true.
I think insecurity is definitely linked to our level of knowledge. The more we know, the more reason we have to be insecure. I guess that's better than walking around (or writing) blindly.
I agree with you, Lee. When I first started writing, it seemed so easy, but once I learned rules and all that stuff, those things started dragging me down. Sometimes I wish I could go back to that moment and write all my first drafts then start editing with the knowledge I have now.
Great post!!!follow me on gfc and i follow you back!!Now i follow you on instagram,bloglovin i hope you follow me too!!kiss
The older we are, the more we know… I've done my summer trips. I have a week vacation in October planned.
When unaware you won't pull out your hair lol
I think the phrase "Ignorance is Bliss" applies here. So true, when you're unaware of what you're up against, you're less likely to be scared, because the dangers aren't real yet.
Swinging by with some coffee–helps drown insecurities:) *waves to Mario*
Uncharted
You are such a great writer!!
To my knowledge, all writers who are 'worth their salt' experience moments of insecurity. After all, you are sharing some of your inner self with the world.
Instead of shunning it, we should learn to accept and manage the 'self-doubt monster'. It's here to stay.
And now I need to 'practise what I've just preached'————– LOL
Hi Lee – thanks for the thumbs up re my blog … the A-Z can be an anxiety challenge: I enjoy it … Road trips are fun .. I'm doing a few local ones … and later in the year may go on a road trip as such. Cheers Hilary
I'm not sure if I find the fact that you still feel insecure reassuring or horrifying!
Other than a quick weekend jaunt, I've had no trips this summer. I'm feeling the travel itch, but I'm trying to control it. Have fun on your travels!
I believe that all writers are insecure somewhat. Most of us are introverts and already are anxious enough.
I guess insecurity is a part of being a writer. We do the best we can and hope some nice agent or publisher likes our work. So we're insecure while waiting for the verdict.
My insecurity does seem to grow but I do expect it and handle it better, I think. I need to get back on that road trip…
Before I was published, I worried less. I only thought about getting an agent. Then with each step and with each book published, I have new concerns, even though I'm better at handling them. Still, that insecurity pops in.
I keep expecting it to get easier too. If you know the pitfalls and the things you must do to make your work better — it should be easy to accomplish, right? Not so much. I used to write with a list hanging nearby of things to remember, like tension in every scene. I learned it eventually and took it down. Now if I put up a list of all the things I know I need to put in my chapters, it would be about three pages long. Single spaced. Argh!
Hi, Lee,
SO true, As we learn more the more insecure in the knowledge of what we have to succumb for success.
CL, I think you are so right. The more we know, the more trepidation we have as we face those hurdles. The difference for me is, the older I get, the wiser I am about the choices as those hurdles appear.
I've been traveling a lot this year. A bit mind-boggling, actually. I haven't figured too much out, except I try very hard not to think too far in the future. I smile as often as I can. I find one thing to love about myself every day. It's generally my hair. And I wonderful things to happen. All that keeps my mind occupied and there seems less time for insecurities. Go figure.
I think it's the "ignorance is bliss" phenomenon. When I first decided to write full time, I was sure all my stories would get picked up right away. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. So then came the nuts and bolts, do-your-homework period, and after a lot more time than I would have liked, they did start getting picked up, and one of my books did, too. And do I feel sublimely secure now? Nope, I've read enough to know that more homework is always right around the corner.
A really young, unpublished writer said to me, "I don't ever edit or revise my work. It seems to just come out fine the first time." Hahahaha– this writer could have used a little more insecurity.
I'm not sure if insecurities ever go away. If you get rid of some, they'll probably just be replaced by different ones. Hopefully we just learn to deal with the worst of it.
It just seems that we develop new insecurities or experience the same one over and over again that we thought'd we'd get over. *sighs*
It just seems that we develop new insecurities or experience the same one over and over again that we thought'd we'd get over. *sighs*
Insecurity is based on fear. Fear of loss, failure, ridiculed…you name it. It can really twist a person into knots if not careful. I have no road trips that will be longer than a day. My hubby and I always visit one town per year that we have never been to. Yesterday my best friend and I took a little jaunt to visit Canada's Oldest Maple Tree- years old
I was thinking about this just yesterday! The more I learn the more I know all that can go wrong and freak out in advance lol. That's not to say I ever want to stop learning. It's for the best after all, no matter how much older and immature I get π
Insecurity, it's all in our heads. But dang if I know how to oust it, particularly since it's living there rent free! Time for a serious eviction notice.
I absolutely agree w/your theory. Stupid insecurity. On a more positive note, my family and I went to Grand Canyon, Bryce and Zion. It was fabulous.
You are exactly right! The older you get the more stuff you are aware of in this world to be worried about. I hope that made sense;-)
The higher up you get the farther down it is. I so get this, but I'm still looking up with one toe on the ground. π
Anna from Elements of Writing
Like Catherine, my insecurities roller coaster. Up and down, up and down. It doesn't help that I'm older either. I'm just taller and able to see farther down the road!
For me, insecurity comes and goes. It seems to coincide with how physically fit I am and how tired I am. LOL.
Wonderful thoughts indeed. Greetings!
I know my insecurities don't seem to diminish even after more than a dozen books accepted for publication. You may have hit on the answer.
Susan Says
The more I learn the more I think how will I do it all. Things do get done, but I'm never finished. A lot of walks with my dog help me relax.
Mario is such a cutie! I did my summer road trip in the spring to get a huge chunk of writing done in AZ. Now it's back to sweating in the humid trenches of MI. The more you know, the more you know what to fear. Ignorance is sometimes bliss but knowledge makes you prepared.
I always thought I'd be more confident the older I got. Eh, not so much. But I'm working on it. π
I hadn't thought about it, but I think you are 100% correct. The more we know the more insecure we become. We are a crazy bunch, no doubt LOL. Good thing we can all be in this together. π
You know, the thing I love about this groups is that half of us come needing, and the other half come offering. We totally balance and buoy each other up. Such a great thing.
I agree, it does get worse, especially when you keep reading other amazing writers, and think, is mine even close to being that good? And then you see the success and wonder, what am I doing wrong. Oh dear, did someone say there's a FF challenge… distraction, that's my key! π
My theory is the more I know, the stupider I feel.
It all depends what one is insecure about, we are all different in our make ups and what one feels comfortable with another person wouldn't.
Great post Lee.
Yvonne.
I think in the beginning, we are naive and don't know to be so insecure. But the more we learn, the more reasons we have to panic.
I think our insecurities (about everything) increases with age because we're so much more concerned about life.
I agree that the insecurities do shift as we go. My main one right now is that my new book won't sell as well as the first one. I'm wondering if that surge of sales I had with Come Back was just dumb luck.
IWSG #119 until Alex culls the list again.
Insecurity hits me when I think about things too much, so I try not to do that. π